We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
