This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
