Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize