Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
