its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
