So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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