Buhtt sex?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
