If that was your dad, he is hot
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
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