You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize