The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
