Midget sex pt 2 tonight
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
