So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
