Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
