It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
