Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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