I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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