32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Watching her eat just hurts me
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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