awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
