his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
