I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
