Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize