He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
