Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
