: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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