If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
