Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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