kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
