I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
