What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
