Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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