She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
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