The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Randomize
