She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
My breasts were aching with rage.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Randomize
