whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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