Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
