Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
What drink are we having for lunch?
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize