You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize