In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Randomize
