There is no way he is gay with that hair.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Randomize
