i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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