facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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