i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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