My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I got inside last night via doggy door
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Randomize
