I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
