using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
