I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
so let's talk penis.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
