I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
We're too hungover to prance.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
PANTIES FOUND
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
