My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
