haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
So squirting runs in the family.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
