yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
