This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize