At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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